My Dress, My Words, My Confidence

You treated me like I was a princess

Like I was royalty

But, would you do what you did to me if I was really royalty

Would you?

You objectified me

Acted like I was just like every other girl

My dress – provoking

My words – flirting

My confidence – overbearing

So you decided that it was okay

That it was okay to take everything I had away from me

My dress

And then my words

And finally my confidence

So, as I stood there staring into the mirror, I thought it was my fault

Because I made you do it

It was my dress, right?

Provoking

It was my words, right?

Flirting

It was my confidence right?

Overbearing

But, all along I knew it was you

This was your fault not mine

But somehow I convinced myself that it was me

Because if I spoke out

If I cried for help

The first words that would come out of someones’s mouth are “What were you wearing?”

And I want to tell them a dress

A dress mid-thigh, yellow, off shoulder with 6 inch black stilettos

They too will say that it is my fault

Because after all it was

MY dress

MY words

MY confidence

It was on me

You Do Not Define Me

I am not who I thought I was

Who I was raised to be

I was raised to walk with my head held high and my confidence even higher

I was raised to make sure my voice was louder than anybody’s in the room

I was raised to make sure that my dignity was kept at all times

I was raised to accept everyone for who they are

I was raised to need no validation in my life

But you, you

Did something to me

Made me different

You stripped me of my dignity

Silenced me

Made me your slave

And somehow, for some reason I obliged

Every time you came home drunk

Every punch you threw at my face

Every hand that went down my shirt and unhooked my bra

I thought it would be the last

I thought you loved me

I thought you wanted to see me grow

But instead you broke me

You kept me captive in a world of lies and assumption

You made me forget everything that I was taught

I was blinded your overwhelming love and affection

So I thought you were right for me

I left my family behind for you and you turn out like this

But it is over now

I am not going to take it anymore

You broke me

And hurt me

And beat me

And killed me

But now, I am stronger

You made me who I am and I am thankful for that

But please don’t think that I can’t rise up from the ruble

Don’t think that I can’t keep my head up straight and and put that crown back on my head

Because I am me

And no one can change that

Not even you

Just remember

You do not define me